There’s a very big difference between what we need and what we want
Your heart will always remain intact. Even when someone tries to break it, the pain won’t feel so overwhelming.There have been times I got so wrapped up in other people that I lost sight of why I wanted them in my life in the first place. I had just subconsciously decided I needed them.
It’s taken me many years to learn that deriving pleasure from being around other people and needing company to feel happy are two very different things.
I’ve discovered that complete self-love is the only way I will ever feel truly fulfilled.
Self-love comes in different forms. There’s taking some “me time” to relax and recharge, and there’s splurging on something pretty just because it makes you feel good.
The most important kind, however, is the one that ensures your security and confidence as a person.
Why is self-love so important?
1. If you only rely on yourself for love, then you will always be fulfilled.
I’m not saying you won’t still have those rough days, but rather, you’ll know that you can get through them regardless of who is around you.
It’s easier to get through the tough times when you’re not waiting for someone else to make you feel better.
2. Heartbreak won’t feel as bad because you won’t actually be alone.
That empty hole will close even faster when you know that you’ll be okay because all you really need in life is yourself.
3. Your relationships will be healthier because you want to be with them instead of needing to be with them.
Need creates clinginess and jealousy. Want creates passion and desire. Which sounds better to you? No one wants to be a stage-five clinger.
4. Love from others feels extra satisfying.
Love from others is like that super satisfying feeling you get after having a really healthy and fulfilling meal and then having a bowl of ice cream. Your heart (like your belly) will just say, “Yaaaaas.”
5. Success will feel even better because you won’t need to look to others for approval.
You don’t need someone else to tell you that you can do something; you already know you can.
So, when someone does say so, the extra vote of confidence will be even more gratifying.
I’m not saying you have to be an island or you should always be arrogant; wanting another human and feeling wanted by him or her in return can be such a delightful feeling. Enjoy it, but don’t require it. There’s a difference.